I just blogged to say I hate this December 25, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in blogging, karachiite rants, music, pakistan, politics, randomness, the great beyond.Tags: music, pakistan
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With apologies to Stevie Wonder.
I just blogged to say I hate this
No New Year’s Day to celebrate
No Baitullah Mehsud to scare, he’s been droned away
No end to stereotyping
No songs for Musharraf to sing
In fact here’s just another ordinary day
No one is sane
No peace looms
No weddings can run till the next day’s noon
But what it is, is something true
Made up of these three words that I must say to you
I just blogged to say I hate this
I just tweeted to say I know you do too
I know you’ll retweet that too
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart
No summer’s high
No electricity in July
No NRO left on which to write
No autumn breeze
No falling leaves
Not even time for drones to fly in Quetta’s skies
No Younis Khan
No sanity
No giving thanks to all the rants Blackwater brings
But what it is, though old so new
That TTP scares you like no three letters could ever do
I just blogged to say I hate this
I just tweeted to say I know you do too
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart
If you’d like to sing along, here’s the original, saccharine Stevie Wonder song:
The Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Yet To Come December 21, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in blogging, randomness.Tags: christmas, pakistan, random, Twitter
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So I saw a (fake) Christmas tree in a store window today and was trying to think of what I was doing at this time last year. Or the year before. Since I had to look it up on my blog, clearly I should accept that I am growing old but also, revel in genius of having blogged every mundane detail of my life for posterity!
But yes, Christmas. The end of the year, the end of the decade, all that. I’ve already tried reliving the past decade on Twitter through the #youtubedistractionday tweets (which have all magically disappeared from the website, oh no!). But while I do not foresee hours and days of free time in the next two weeks to blog ‘the best of 2009/the decade/etc etc’ lists, this is how I feel this year. I know its a year old – and was rather widely circulated last year (how many of those people had ever heard of Pearls Before Swine before? = .02%) – but here it goes anyway.
This also explains why I have turned to buying comfort food. I will only be concerned for my mental health once I start searching for Nice biscuits and drinking doodhsevenup*.
*(yes, milk mixed with 7up. yes, you read that right. yes, you must try it. no, i am not a crazy person.)
Lost in translation November 21, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in pakistan, politics, the obama era, working words.Tags: Afghanistan, pakistan, taliban
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What I hope to never do again at 1 AM: simultaneously reading and translating an interview with Taliban commander Jalaluddin Haqqani. You can read some of the excerpts here, including the quote of the week:
“….The American public trusted Obama, and voted him into power. Hence Obama should save his country from the fire that Bush had shoved it in.”
In a #SummerofTaliban violence… November 19, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in blogging, music, pakistan, randomness, working words.Tags: journalism, music, pakistan, stereotypes, taliban, Twitter
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Inspired by Asif Akhtar’s comment on the previous post, last night was all about rocking on!! (credit: rocking on – Guardian/The National, !! – from the film Rock On!!) with the #SummerofTaliban posts on Twitter. I had originally planned to dig out some of the best ones but it would take me hours, so you should just go ahead and read the whole thing. It was more New York than Pakistan really.
In the spirit of cliches and stereotypes, it would have also totally qualified to be picked up as a “soft story” with the headline ‘Twitter Pakistanis turn to humour to defy the Taliban” (There, I’ve even written the headline! I should be PAID to do this) but sadly no foreign publication has been in touch yet.
Once again, can’t thank Asif enough for the idea. Everyone else, did you have nothing better to do? In a #SummerofTaliban violence, I’m glad to know your lives are as sad as mine.
In a summer of Taliban violence, Pakistan is doing WHAT?! November 18, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in music, pakistan, working words.Tags: journalism, music, pakistan, stereotypes, taliban
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It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was a time of ridiculous conspiracies and pesky shadows of the Taliban. And in this time, there existed a magical book. It contained within it powerful words. Words, that would inspire several 140 character messages, cause much rubbing of the eyes and wondering if the words had been correctly; words that would make careers. It was the Book of Pakistan Stereotypes, and every journalist of the land had one.
——
Now I don’t know if this magical book actually exists or not. But I’m being forced to believe it does. After all, there has to be a logical reason as to why I have read the most ridiculous sentence ever drafted in two different publications about the same topic. Without further ado:
From The National (Nov 17):
A career in rock ’n’ roll might not be a conventional – or easy – choice for young Pakistanis, but despite the militant insurgency and social difficulties, aspiring musicians are finding ways to keep an alternative music scene alive.
Even with accelerating Taliban violence, Pakistan’s underground music-makers are rocking on.
From the Guardian (Sept 1):
Even in a summer of Taliban violence young Pakistanis are rocking on. An underground music scene is quietly thriving in the country’s major cities, nourished by the internet and the passion of mostly amateur bands.
As a young Pakistani, I sadly cannot explain to you what this sentence means. I wish I could. Meanwhile, I really must get my hands on this magical book that has brought to the limelight phrases like ‘under the shadow of the Taliban‘, ‘educated elite’,’Facebook Pakistanis unite against terror’ and my personal favourite, ‘in their jeans, T-shirts and sunglasses, looked more New York than Lahore’.
I’d write more but I’m going to defy the Taliban by drinking imported coffee instead. After all, in a winter of Taliban violence, us young Pakistanis must do something, right?
Shadowland November 7, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in blogging, fashion, karachiite rants, pakistan, working words.Tags: Fashion Pakistan Week, karachi, taliban
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Ah, fashion week. Who knew it would result in such a string of articles from the foreign press, all reporting breathlessly on a four-day event happening ‘under the shadow of the Taliban’. I contributed a post to the Changing Up Pakistan blog today on how the event is anything, but under any shadow.
You can read the post here. That ends this exercise in shameless self promotion.
Mamma Mia! Here they go…(not again!) October 31, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in movies, music, working words.Tags: Abba, Mamma Mia
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For everyone brought up on a steady diet of Abba, the musical and film Mamma Mia! came as a welcome refresher course on the Swedish quartet’s music. Even if the acting in the 2008 film was nauseating at best and mind-blowingly atrocious at worst. But as Hugh Jackman triumphantly announced while hosting this year’s Academy Awards – “the musical is back!” – apparently, so is the film’s sequel.
Mamma Mia! – a musical based on Abba songs – became the highest-grossing film ever at the UK box office, and made a staggering 609 million dollars worldwide. And now a sequel is underway: Mamma Mia! 2
One of the film’s stars, Amanda Seyfried, told BBC News, “I’ve been talking to some insiders and it’s not something that they haven’t been working on. I don’t actually know anything other than that.” She also says Meryl Streep is set to sign on for the sequel, “I will do it. And I know Meryl’s game as well, so bring it on. It will be so cool. I think we all had the best time and we all got along so well. It was like some days it felt like we were just people on vacation.”
But as the Guardian (in a bitingly sarcastic piece) pointed out, what music will they use? The original film already featured all of Abba’s most popular hits, including ‘Dancing Queen’, ‘Mamma Mia’ and ‘Take a Chance on Me’. Unless the filmmakers decide to recycle their more well-known songs for the sequel, there isn’t a chance of the film being as successful.
And while the musical format – seen in recent years via films like Dreamgirls, Chicago and High School Musical – seems to have returned to Hollywood, it doesn’t always bode well. Even though the High School Musical franchise is a worldwide hit, the acting in the films hasn’t improved a notch, and the amount of bad singing that these films have featured would make anyone’s ears bleed.
Mamma Mia! may have been a hit, but for a far better glimpse into the band’s music (and a better nostalgia trip), watch the 1977 promotional film, Abba: The Movie (see point above about being raised on a steady diet of Abba). The film, which traces a radio jockey desperately trying to get an interview with the band at the height of their success, sees him get in a ridiculous chase all over Australia to find them. The music selection, the concert footage and the fact that Abba: The Movie stars all of the Abba members, is far more delightful than Meryl Streep wasting her talents to moan and cry about previous loves and Pierce Brosnan’s lack of singing ability.
Reads of the week and imploding dreams October 23, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in damascus diaries, pakistan, politics, randomness, working words.Tags: Afghanistan, journalism, pakistan, politics, syria, taliban
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First, a little heads-up on my current state of mind, brought to life by this Pearls Before Swine comic
Moving on to this week’s must-reads:
Lights Off, Diyas On Huma Imtiaz writes for Newsline about Diwali celebrations in Karachi amidst loadshedding
The curious case of Rehman Malik Rabia at the Grand Trunk Road blog wrote the best sentence ever on Rehman Malik – and points out the most disturbing part of the IIU students protesting when the much-loved (/end sarcasm) minister visited the campus after it had been attacked by two suicide bombers.
You see, in a way Rehman Malik is the perfect symbol of the Pakistani civilian government – bumbling, inept, hated by all, and a distraction from the deeper dysfunction that you have to listen a bit harder to hear
Take a Chance on Me? Faiza S. Khan points out how not attending Mamma Mia! (which was being staged in Karachi) has become such a debatable topic
سب کی چھٹی Mohammed Hanif takes a look at what’s being discussed while educational institutions in the country are closed
اور اگر آپ کو تاریخ میں دلچسپی نہیں ہے تو آپ سابقہ کشمیری مجاہد اور تحریک طالبان کے موجودہ روح رواں الیاس کشمیری کے حالات زندگی پڑھ سکتے ہیں۔ کشمیری صاحب سے پوچھا گیا کہ جب کشمیر اور افغانستان فتح ہو جائے گا تو کیا جہاد ختم ہو جائے گا۔ انہوں نے فرمایا نہیں اس کے بعد ہندوستان سے حیدرآباد اور جوناگڑھ واپس لینے کے لیے جہاد ہوگا۔ اور اس کے بعد؟ ان کا کہنا تھا کہ دنیا میں کسی نہ کسی جگہ تو جہاد کی ضرورت ہوگی پھر ہم وہاں جہاد کریں گے۔
A tale of two Pakistans Hanif again, pointing out the differences of life in and out of the culture bubble
Held by the Taliban The David Rohde series in the New York Times was one of the first things I read in the morning all this week. The five part series details Rohde’s kidnapping in Afghanistan, being shifted to Waziristan and his eventual escape seven months later.
Bashar al Assad believes in Syria. (Photograph taken April 2008 in Damascus)
Shadowland A brilliantly written article by Dan Belt in National Geographic about Syria and the man who runs it – Bashar al Assad. Gripping, gritty and grim, it highlights every point almost too perfectly.
This is the kind of article I dream to someday write. As Syria News Wire put it, Shadowland – which the blog calls the best article on Syria in a decade – “should be compulsory reading for every journalist flying into Damascus International Airport.”
Amen to that.
Just Dance! October 16, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in randomness.Tags: The Office, YouTube
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I can’t believe its taken me this long to blog about it, but I’ve been busy watching The Office on repeat and blogging here.
Anyhoo, this is by far, the best moment on any television show this season. The Office referenced the YouTube video that went viral – the JK wedding dance.
New York, New York… October 6, 2009
Posted by Saba Imtiaz in movies, working words.Tags: Bollywood, US
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Najibullah Zazi (AP Photo/Ed Andrieski)
In an ironic twist, Bollywood finally gets the plot of one of their myriad East-meets-West movies to match reality. Take a look at the reel-life cases of the film New York and the American terrorism suspect Najibullah Zazi
I believe I owe the makers of New York an apology for declaring that the subject of Muslims in a post-9/11 America had become outdated. For all of Bollywood’s twisted East-meet-West stories, one may have actually may been more realistic than earlier thought. Directed by Kabir Khan (of Kabul Express fame), New York (starring John Abraham, Katrina Kaif, Neil Nitin Mukesh and Irrfan Khan) released this summer to mixed reviews and has been widely compared to Shoaib Mansoor’s Khuda Kay Liye. (In an interview John Abraham declared that New York began where Khuda Kay Liye left off. After watching the film, one wished Khuda Kay Liye had inspired better sequels.
New York’s central character is Sameer Sheikh (played by Abraham), who evolves from a patriotic American citizen into a terrorist mastermind running a sleeper cell in New York. The real-life parallel to the film is the case of Najibullah Zazi, a patriotic American resident and coffee vendor in New York who is being held on the charge of planning to attack landmarks in New York, with the possible help of accomplices. Sounds a bit familiar? Take a look at the similarities between the two.
Starring…
Sameer Sheikh: An Indian-American Muslim.
Najibullah Zazi: An Afghan Muslim and legal resident of the USA.
Popular Avenue
Sameer Sheikh: A boisterous student (who is also a photographer) who is fairly popular at his university in New York and has a somewhat short fuse.
Najibullah Zazi: Zazi ran a coffee-and-doughnut cart near Wall Street. According to a customer, “He was well spoken. He always said good morning to everyone. He used to memorize what everyone needed in the morning.”
The Stars and Stripes
Sameer Sheikh: Sameer’s character is introduced via a sequence where he competes with another student to plant the American flag on the roof of the university. He often talks about his love for the USA.
Najibullah Zazi: Zazi had a ‘God Bless America’ sticker on his coffee cart and told a reporter: “This is one of the best countries in the world. It gives you every right.”
Reaction to 9/11
Sameer Sheikh: As the visuals of 9/11 began to unfold live on a television screen at the university, Sameer consoles his distraught girlfriend Maya (Katrina Kaif)
Najibullah Zazi: A friend says of Zazi’s reaction to the terrorist attack: “I don’t know how people could do things like this. I’d never do anything like that.”
The Age Factor
Sameer Sheikh: If one assumes Sameer was 22 by the time he graduated from university in 2001, by the time the film picks up seven years later, he’s 29.
Najibullah Zazi: Zazi is 24 years old.
New York, I love you, but you’re bringing me down
Sameer Sheikh: Sameer is questioned at a bus terminal and put into a detention facility (one can only assume) on account of his name and Muslim origin, ten days after 9/11. After nine months, Sameer is released due to lack of evidence against him. (In the film, the FBI claims that photographs of the World Trade Centre and the New York skyline that he had taken for a photography project were part of a terrorist plot).
Najibullah Zazi: Zazi’s motives are unknown. He has pleaded not guilty to the charges, but the odds stack against him as he is also reported to have received terrorist training at a camp in Pakistan.
The evidence
Sameer Sheikh: The sleeper cell has gathered a large amount of equipment (bought from some wily Eastern Europeans) to be able to carry out a large scale attack.
Najibullah Zazi: Zazi has been charged with gathering a large amount of chemicals (bought from drugstores) to carry out an attack.
The site
Sameer Sheikh: His sleeper cell plots to attack the FBI building in New York.
Najibullah Zazi: Various reports have cited the site for New York Fashion Week and other landmarks as those that Zazi was plotting to attack on the eve of the anniversary of 9/11.
Betrayal, betrayal
Sameer Sheikh: The investigating FBI officer (Roshan, played by Irrfan Khan) gets Sameer’s friend Omar (Neil Nitin Mukesh) to infiltrate Sameer’s home and the sleeper cell. Omar finall tells Sameer he’s being watched only when the sleeper cell is about to bomb the FBI building, because Sameer’s wife Maya is inside the building.
Najibullah Zazi: The New York Police Department used a religious leader as a source (an imam from Queens) Ahmad Wais Afzali, but Afzali has also been charged with telephoning Zazi to tell him he was being watched, then lying about it.
And in the end…
While New York came to a morbid and inane end (which debunked any sense that this film had), Najibullah Zazi’s case is not only serious but the evidence and testimony isn’t as clear-cut as in celluloid. In any case, it’s worth watching New York again for, as painful as it may seem.
Stay tuned for another apology if an Indian stuntman ends up dating Denise Richards and being feted by Sylvester Stallone ala Kambakkht Ishq.
- Information on Najibullah Zazi from Associated Press and the New York Times: ‘Najibullah Zazi, From Smiling Face at the Cart to Terror Suspect’, Sept 26, 2009.
